Agitated, amongst other things...

Have you ever had a period in your life where you were just real agitated about some things? That's how I have been feeling lately. I don't want to be bothered by people, I don't wanna be around people. I just wanna be by myself but at the same time I want to be around only ONE person cause I know that person WILL make me feel like how I am suppose to. Maybe I am feeling this way because it has been 2 months and some change since I have had sex...you know built up sex. I am dealing with dumb shit at work that unnecessary. Its like the more I try to be friendly and speak to people to show that I am not a bad fucking person the more hatred comes my way. I feel like going to work and talking to no one...then once I do that I have a problem, right? Bills are getting on my nerves...it seems like I can't even make a dent in my student loans...I am beginning to crush my car payments though off top. I gave them more then they were asking as well as the student loans, but the student loans are on some bullshit...but I digress from that issue. Sprint hit me with the okie doke and I have until the 19th of September to come up with with money for a new phone, new plan, and a new wireless provider. The dilemma I am having is the phone I want is $300 and some change but the plan is cheap and affordable for one wireless provider, the other provider has a cheap phone I like for like $200 and some change but their plan is higher and some what affordable...WAS trying to get my phone bought by someone else but that isn't going to happen...I really don't feel like getting into that one...ANYWAYZ and on top of it all my mother and her medical situation that I am dealing with...its like everything is hitting me at once and I am backed into a corner...no hands stretching out, no advice from others, no nothing. ONCE AGAIN I am by myself...its like I always said I am ALWAYS there but when its my turn can't find shit! SMH!!

I actually take that back...I have had people ask bout my mom and how she was doing and everything but the ONLY person that I can recall was my boo. He was constantly asking me how I was doing and everything and he was OUT OF THE COUNTRY...smh yeah I know sad but very true. I really miss him right now...that has got to be my problem...I don't know I am just confused on alot and I feel like I don't have time...hopefully something with break through in a matter of time...